


Adjust. Adapt. Adore.

by JohnBurtonLee



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Implied Sexual Content, POV Hermione Granger, References to Depression, embarrassing parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:53:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26117518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JohnBurtonLee/pseuds/JohnBurtonLee
Summary: After four years away at University, Hermione is coming back home. Just a few things have changed since she left. Her parents are retiring. The Weasleys are distant. And Harry’s struggling to be a single parent.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Harry Potter
Comments: 30
Kudos: 257
Collections: Prompt Bank Garage Sale





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by [HarmonyandCo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarmonyandCo/pseuds/HarmonyandCo) in the [PromptBankGarageSale](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/PromptBankGarageSale) collection. 



> Anonymous prompt. Summary text is the prompt.

Hermione resisted the urge to fidget as she waited outside the door to 12 Grimmauld Place. In hindsight she should have popped over to somewhere with a floo and used that, but she had already knocked, so she was stuck waiting. And waiting. Why did she refuse Harry's offer to have a key to the house? She could try Apparating in, but she wasn't sure she was still on the access list. There's no reason to think Harry would have taken her off, but that's not something you want to find out you were wrong about the hard way. 

She was about to send Harry a patronus when the door opened. Though rather than berate him for his tardiness, the first words out of Hermione's mouth were "You look like shit." And he did. Just the bags under his eyes made it look like he hadn't slept in a month. "Have you been eating right? Work hasn't been too bad, has-" 

"Nice to see you, too," Harry said before he wrapped her into a hug. 

Hermione took a moment to enjoy the fact that _Harry_ initiated a hug before saying, "Sorry, I've spent too much time around Americans. _American college students_." She had just finished her degree in material science and, not to feed into any stereotypes, many engineers lacked some crucial social skills like brain/mouth filters. Still, she had better things to think about, like how good it felt to have Harry's arms around her. 

All too soon Harry pulled back. "Come in. Things are messier than usual-" 

"The house isn't going to eat me, is it?" 

"Oy!" Though judging by the slight smirk on Harry's face he wasn't actually offended. "Unfortunately, since the explosion, things have changed a lot. You're still welcome to stay with me for as long as you want, but you might not want to." 

Hermione had chalked up the fact that she hadn't heard much from Harry in the last week to the rather massive explosion in a mixed muggle/magical neighborhood. Basically the only message she had gotten from him was that he was alright, but on the list of people that died were Katie Bell and Alicia Spinnet. She had just assumed that Harry had been so busy with the investigation he didn't have time to send any other word. 

"Last I checked, my parents were still practicing home nudism, so, yes, I want to stay here." Picking up the nudist lifestyle was probably the most disturbing consequence of her parents' stay in Australia. It was the one that almost made her wish she had done anything else to keep them safe. It was only almost since it had worked. 

Harry made a face. She knew he thought her parents were lovely people both physically and in terms of personality, but he still didn't want to imagine (or see) them naked because they were Hermione's parents. Of course, he also thought that playing up the home nudism thing was their way of subtly punishing Hermione for sending them to Australia in the first place. Hermione disagreed because doing it on purpose wouldn't be nearly as traumatic for her. 

Stepping into the house, things didn't seem any messier than normal, and was in fact a great deal better than her first impression of the home the better part of a decade ago. Harry had redecorated when he started Auror training, including getting rid of Walpurga's portrait. The wallpaper and carpet had been replaced and looked fine. There was the faint scent of curry, but it seemed fresh, as if it had been served recently. 

"You didn't finally meet a girl, did you?" That would be massively awkward. Historically girls interested in Harry have regarded Hermione as a threat even when they weren't living together. Not to mention the small fact that prior to the explosion and Katie's death, Harry and Katie had been connected romantically in the public eye. They weren't actually dating and actually denied it in interviews several times. They just didn't deny it too hard because Katie had been dating Alicia and didn't want that known to her parents. 

"Well, not exactly-" 

The sound of running came from the floor above followed by the pounding of feet down the stairs. The source of the sound was revealed to be a little girl. 

"Daddy! That's not mummy!" The girl burst into tears. 

It took Hermione a few moments to realize who the girl was: Elizabeth Bell, more commonly referred to as Lizzie, at least by Harry. Lizzie Bell was the big reason that no one believed the denials that Harry and Katie weren't involved. For one thing, the girl looked exactly like what you would imagine the spawn of Harry and Katie would be like: a miniature Katie with messy black hair. Though Harry had finally managed to get his hair to look like it was supposed to be messy as a fashion statement as opposed to a bloodline curse. 

Harry also took his godfather duties very seriously and part of that was plenty of play dates between Teddy and Lizzie, and to a lesser degree Victoire. Teddy was only a half a year older than Lizzie as compared to a bit more than a full year older than Victoire. But even if it was for the kids, that still meant spending a lot of time with Katie, fueling the rumors. 

In the here and now, Harry sent Hermione an apologetic look and picked up the little girl, making soothing noises. Hermione lifted her bag and gestured towards the upstairs. Harry nodded and she went to her room to unpack while Harry tried to calm the girl. 

Yes, she had her own room in Grimmauld Place. Due to her parents discovering the joys of nudism she found it much less awkward to stay with Harry when she was in the country. She hardly kept anything here before because, and she would only admit this to herself, it felt kind of creepy while Kreacher was still alive, and she didn't want to explain the change in habit. The old elf had died a couple years ago, the spite that was keeping him alive wearing off after Regulus's death was finally avenged. 

Despite having her own room, she had somehow managed to not meet Lizzie until now. Well, it wasn't that strange. In the last four years, she had only been in England for Winter holidays and a week each year between summer and fall terms, which missed Harry's birthday. Between Hermione spending time with her parents and Lizzie spending time with Katie's family, not meeting each other was only somewhat improbable. After all, Lizzie was only Harry's daughter in the rumors. 

Being familiar with the room and being the naturally organized type, it didn't take long for her to unpack, though she did make a mental note to redecorate. When Harry had done the renovations, he had chosen mostly reds and golds as a giant middle finger to Sirius' parents. Hermione's bedroom had a dark red wallpaper with golden floral patterns, which was something she put up with when she was using the room for only weeks at a time, but if she was going to be around full time, she wanted something a bit brighter. 

She went downstairs to find Lizzie red eyed and "drawing" with crayons. The quotes weren't a commentary on her artistic skill, rather an observation that she was more interested in smashing the crayons against the paper as if she had a grudge against sheet materials than doing any actual art. The red crayon she was using made it look like she was carving bloody gashes in the paper. Harry was on a couch nearby, looking half dead. 

"Hey," she said as she settled next to him. 

Harry flopped an arm in what was probably intended to be an acknowledgment. 

"Has she been here the whole week?" 

"Yup…. Well, no. Andi has had her when I had to go into work. But I was babysitting when Polperro happened, which is better than the alternative." 

"What about the father?" Last she checked Harry didn't know who the father was and respected Katie's privacy not to press on that point, but he very obviously had a very good reason to do some investigating since then. 

Harry's head flopped backwards. "All I know is that he was a Muggleborn, the Snatchers got him and that Katie was rather embarrassed that she slept with him." 

"No one else knows who he was?" 

"Katie obviously did. Alicia did. I think Fred knew. Mr. and Mrs. Bell did." 

Hermione gathered that the last two were also dead as well, though one thing didn't make sense. "Why would she tell Fred?" 

Harry snorted. "I believe it came up when she was threatening to geld Fred for spiking the punch at the party." 

"Not George?" 

"From what I heard, George was the one Fred was trying to get drunk." The twins always did seem to cause more collateral damage when they were trying to prank each other. 

"She called you daddy." 

"Daddy is daddy!" said the girl fiercely, glancing in the direction of the couch. 

"We've been arguing about it for half a year now…, and I think any reasons I had to object went away last week. I signed the custody papers yesterday." 

"That seems fast." 

"Hmm. I was in Katie's will. It might have been tricky last year before Katie removed Angelina-" 

"She removed Angelina? Why?" 

"You know how she and George have been off and on again? George had started drinking again at the time." 

"Has it been that bad?" 

Harry made a half heart hand waggle. "It was pretty bad back then, but he's sober now. Katie just never got around to putting Angelina back on the list. That was also before Lizzie started calling me daddy-" 

"Daddy is daddy!" 

"I know, Lizzie," Harry sighed. "You can call me daddy." Lizzie's scowl was replaced by a ferocious smile for a moment before she went back to her aggressive art attempt. "Where was I? Oh, right. Even if she was still on the list, I don't think she'd fight me on it now." 

Angelina probably wasn't in a particularly good condition after losing two of her best friends. Which reminded Hermione "Did they ever find out what happened in Polperro?" 

"This hasn't been released officially yet, but basically there was a muggle drug lab-" 

"In Polperro? I know being a village that small wouldn't eliminate drug use, but I can't imagine that a drug lab with enough chemicals to create an explosion that large would have gone unnoticed. The chemical shipments alone would have been conspicuous." She didn't think she could blame knowing how big of an explosion a drug lab would cause on being in America. This was purely a function of being in the presence of geeks who rated explosions in movies on plausibility, and she had the suspicion that transcended nation. 

Harry smiled slightly at her verbal discharge. She suspected that her bad habit would have been worth a larger grin if not for the subject matter. "Long story short, from what we can tell, a magical kid got in it, got high and accidental magic combined with chemicals created a fuel air explosion." 

"They're not going to be able to blame this on a gas explosion," Hermione said, referring to the Obliviators. "Are you going to get in trouble for telling me?" 

"What are they going to do, fire me?" 

"Harry!" It wasn't like him to rely on his reputation to shield him like this. 

"What? I turned in my resignation right after signing the adoption papers." 

"But-?" Hermione had been about to say that he loved his job, but he didn't. He was very good at it, but he kept doing it because he thought he had a duty. Well, apparently, being a single father trumped that. 

"You would not believe how much shi- er, trouble Kingsley gave me about leaving before the Polperro mess got cleaned up." 

"No, I think I can," Hermione said dryly. 

Hermione hated the part of her that was jealous of a four year old girl. Four and a half. Four and three quarters. No, that didn't make things sound any better. 

The point was, Harry wouldn't have quit the Aurors for Hermione, despite how much it hurt her every time he got injured even just in training, but he did for Lizzie. Rationally, Hermione understood that Lizzie was a dependent child who had just lost her mother while Hermione was an adult. Lizzie needed Harry in a way that Hermione didn't. 

It just drove home the fact that Hermione would never be the most important person in Harry's life. That role was taken and claimed for a good dozen years. 

It was stupid, petty and irrational, and Hermione hated being irrational. Harry didn't even know that Hermione wanted to be more than friends. That might have something to do with the fact that Hermione had only very recently admitted it to herself… if last winter counted as very recently. But in terms of how long they had known each other it was a recent development. 

Ironically, her last reservation about pursuing Harry had been his rather dangerous job. Oh, he could have easily found something to do as an Auror that didn't involve going into the field, but Harry wasn't suited to desk work or worse, public relations. Hermione almost rolled her eyes at that thought. He probably would have fired more curses in anger if he got put in a PR roll than he did as an active duty Auror. 

Though, if he did get put in PR he would have worn the dress uniform more often, and Harry looked damned good in the red formal robes. The eye candy probably wasn't worth the likely chaos. 

* * *

Dinner had been Molly's shepherd pie. She'd taken to sending Harry food every now and then even before he had gotten custody of Lizzie. Hermione mostly blamed that on needing something to do with her time with the kids all grown. Now that he was officially a father, he said that it had increased in frequency. It was definitely a nostalgic meal, if a bit heavy for Hermione. 

Lizzie had ended up wearing half of her food. Harry said that it was probably a cry for attention because she was actually perfectly capable of eating neatly. Hermione wasn't sure if that was more because Katie was gone or because Harry's attentions were being directed at an unfamiliar female. Hermione honestly wasn't sure if the looks Lizzie kept giving her were glares or expressions of curiosity. Teddy had spoiled her for reading emotions of children that age by broadcasting his feelings via hair color. 

Hermione had settled in the sitting room, waiting for the food coma to wear off while Harry cleaned Lizzie and attempted to put her to bed. It seemed a bit early to Hermione, but apparently the girl had gotten up early and stubbornly resisted taking a nap all day. In the meantime Hermione enjoyed a glass of apple cider while rereading "Emma." It was actually her least favorite Jane Austen novel, but she needed to cleanse her mind after her roommate, Colleen, made her watch "Clueless" and this was the first chance she had gotten since taking the portkey home. 

It was still better than when Colleen made her sit through "Bridget Jones's Diary," which was closest she came to using magic on a muggle during her time at university. Colleen would have made a perfectly lovely cat. Still, at least Colleen appreciated "Pride and Prejudice" even if she thought that "Bridget Jones" was an acceptable adaptation. Harry, in comparison, had found the novel depressing. 

So given the source of their meal, she was a bit surprised when Harry sat across from her and said, "I hate to be the one to say this…, but don't be surprised if the Weasleys aren't as friendly as they used to be." 

"Don't they remember that Ron is the one who left me?" Hermione huffed. She didn't exactly blame him. Lavender had no one to support her after the Battle of Hogwarts except for Ron and Parvati and Parvati had her own troubles at the time. Ron hadn't technically left Hermione for Lavender, but he didn't think it was appropriate spending so much time with another girl and still dating her. There was something annoying about having spent all the effort making him more responsible and then getting into a situation where the responsible thing being breaking up with her, though she was over it by now. 

At the present day, Ron and Lavender were definitely a couple. Two years ago Hermione had to put up with Ron worrying that Lavender was only with him because he helped her out, which was silly, since being there for someone when they're at their lowest is a pretty good reason to fall in love and that mess sixth year never would have happened if they didn't have some chemistry. 

"That might be the problem." Harry shrugged. "Lavender has been a bit paranoid that you might still be carrying a torch, and you'll be around full time now, so Ron agreed that he'll stay away." 

"I don't know if that's sweet or annoying." Or worrying. Lavender already monopolized a lot of Ron's time. That wasn't jealousy. Hermione had some concerns about unhealthy levels of dependence. 

"I'm voting for both. I mean I feel for her. She's had it rough between recovering physically and recovering emotionally. I don't think anyone is going to shun you, but don't expect invitations to Sunday brunch. Fleur and Bill should be around often enough though." 

"Oh. Victoire?" 

"Yeah. At least she's old enough that play dates make sense." 

Hermione rolled her eyes. Harry had complained that some of Teddy's early play dates had just been babies drooling together in the same room. Even after she made him read the child development literature on the topic, he still didn't see the point. He dutifully followed the guidelines on socialization, but complained that it didn't seem to make any of the sprogs happy. 

They sat in comfortable silence for a while before Harry said, "It's nice having you around." 

"It's nice being home." A beat. "Though maybe you should redecorate with brighter colors." 

Harry groaned. "You were the one who told me that my original choices were too bright." 

"For a red. Harry, the paint you originally chose looked like fresh, wet arterial blood covering the wall." 

He shuddered. "Now that I've had first aid training that sounds pretty bad." 

"Maybe some nice pastels?" 

"I don't want to live inside an Easter Egg, Hermione," he said as he stood up and walked behind her. "Though that might annoy Walpurga as much as the Gryffindor scheme." 

"What are you doing?" 

"Your neck and shoulders look very stiff. Shift over so I can give you a massage." 

Hermione wished that Harry had an ulterior motive for putting his hands on her and wasn't just being a good friend. "My roommate had odd ideas of getting adjusted to the time difference. We fell asleep doing a movie marathon and I was not in a good sleeping position." 

She didn't really notice what Harry said in response to that because he really did have magic hands. 

* * *

Hermione's new job wouldn't start for a couple of weeks, so she mostly spent time with Harry at home. She wasn't much for going out under normal circumstances and most of her friends were gainfully employed. The obvious exception was Harry, and Luna was also a bit of a question mark as Hermione wasn't clear on how funding was handled with Magizoological expeditions. Either way, Luna was in South America and wouldn't be back for another month at least. 

Today Harry had taken Teddy out to watch a junior Quidditch game. It was an event that had been scheduled before Polperro happened and he had gotten custody of Lizzie. It was something he would have felt bad about changing his plans for as Andromeda was working as a legal researcher. She was able to do most of her work from home, but she had wanted the opportunity to go into the office to take care of some of the bits that she couldn't do remotely. 

Lizzie didn't like Quidditch and Hermione didn't mind watching her for the couple of hours that the game would take. (Unlike professional rules, the junior league games had a fixed time limit.) Harry's hurried explanation of why Lizzie disliked Quidditch involved some bitterness on Katie's behalf that she couldn't go professional because of Lizzie. Lizzie only knew that her mummy didn't like reading or hearing about the game and picked up the attitude without understanding the reason. 

Hermione was giving Lizzie some vegetable sticks when the child said, "Daddy likes me better than you." She said this in a very serious tone, though the impact was taken away a bit by the way her legs swung from the chair that was too large for her. 

Hermione just did not know what to do with that statement. Okay, this was a four year old, so this kind of taunt was… normal? Probably? On the plus side, her previous assessment that some of her classmates acted like four year olds was being borne out, so that was good… or bad, depending on how you looked at it. 

"Harry likes us in different ways. You're his little girl and I went to school with him." 

"Oh. What's school like?" Lizzie put a celery stick in her mouth and looked at Hermione expectantly. 

Hermione was glad that Lizzie's ability to stay on topic was also at the level of a four year old. Was that worrying because she was almost five? Was there an actual difference? Hermione's only metric was five year old Teddy, but then again, not staying on topic was probably better than a hyper focused obsession with dinosaurs. Hermione still wasn't sure how the two children were best friends. Part of it could be simple proximity, but they honestly seemed to enjoy spending time with each other. She didn't get it, but with hindsight she also wasn't sure how she managed to stay friends with Ron throughout school either. It made sense at the time and she might remember now if the prat wasn't avoiding her at the moment. 

"Well, Hogwarts is a castle. The first time you go there as a student you ride a boat on the lake…." 

* * *

That evening Hermione had decided to review her research proposal. The Ministry had accepted half of it: the use of material science techniques to develop truly permanent transfigurations. Granted, that was a misnomer since what Hermione had in mind was closer to a charm than a transfiguration, but when selling a proposal details like that were less important. They were less enthused about her follow up proposal to use the permanent transfiguration techniques to manufacture exotic materials for muggles. They didn't see the value in generating good will with the muggle government, but from what Shack had said about the what had happened during the war- 

Her thought process was interrupted by Harry walking into the library. "When I dropped Teddy off, I talked with Andi and she's going to be dropping off Teddy during the day from now on." 

Hermione shook her head. "I still can't believe she's managed to watch him by herself for so long." 

Harry shrugged. "She can do most of her work from home, and she managed to keep _Tonks_ in line. I'm sure Teddy is an angel in comparison. She's said as much. Repeatedly." 

"I suppose that is an accomplishment." She theorized there were some magics for child care and monitoring that didn't get taught in school, much in the same way that muggle schools didn't bother teaching what Colleen termed "life hacks." (There could be a reason for that, since the only one that stuck in her head was how to use the lines on those red plastic party cups to measure alcohol servings.) 

"You're sure you don't have any problem with this?" The look on Harry's face was almost exactly the same when he asked if she was sure she wanted to go on the horcrux hunt with him. 

The idea of Teddy being on the same scale as their camping trip from hell made her smile slightly. "Even if it is an issue, I'll be starting work soon enough." 

"You're the greatest," Harry said before giving her a quick hug. 

Harry was a lot more free with physical affection, which made it harder for Hermione to resent Lizzie. Especially since when he initiated hugs while she was sitting like she was now, she could return the hug and maybe get a feel of his bum while making it seem natural. 

Her two theories about why Harry was more free with his hugs were that he was just in the habit of hugging now that he had two kids to look after, even if Teddy was only part time (though with this news, getting closer to full time now), or he was just so sleep deprived that he forgot to be nervous about initiating contact. 

Considering what happened at dinner with the pork chops later that night, Hermione was leaning more towards the second theory. 

* * *

Hermione hadn't been looking forward to her first dinner with her parents since she got back. They had at least agreed to a restaurant so there was no question of eating in the buff. It was even a nice Italian restaurant and not one of the weird fusion places her parents had been trying out for the past few years. No, the problem was that Hermione had been distracted the last time she called home and admitted to her mother that she had been planning on just maybe pursuing Harry romantically when she got back to England. She blamed Colleen and her techniques for preparing for jet lag. 

"Honestly, Hermione, nothing is going to happen unless you put yourself forward." Thank you, mother, for reminding her why Hermione hadn't shared information about her romantic interests back when she was in school until that last mistake. 

"I'm aware of that, mother." Hermione stabbed her salad roughly with her fork. "I was going to mention something last night, but we had pork chops." 

"Truly a romance killer," muttered her father dryly. 

"Not like that dad. Harry… well, he cut Lizzie's pork chop into bite sized pieces for her. Then, well, he must be used to having both Lizzie and Teddy around, because he turned and started doing the same thing for me." 

Her dad tried to keep the laugh in; he really did. That just led to the waiter coming over to see if he was having an attack or not, which was his cue to let it out. 

After they waved the waiter off, Hermione continued, "As I was saying, he was so mortified, he probably would have died from embarrassment if I tried having a talk with him." 

"Well, it could be worse. Did I tell you about the first time that your mother and I went dancing?" 

Hermione groaned. "Yes. Repeatedly." And if it had happened to her she would never have mentioned it again, not brought it out at the slightest provocation to embarrass her daughter by proxy. 

Her mum smirked over her glass of red wine, but changed the subject. "Was the look on Harry's face when he realized what he was doing funny?" 

Hermione smirked back. "Hilarious. It was like there was a clock ticking above his head. He could tell something was wrong and every tick made that feeling a little stronger. Then the alarm rang and he dropped his fork and knife and jumped back. Lizzie lectured him for a bit on his clumsiness." 

Her dad laughed. "You did the same thing to me all the time." 

Hermione sniffed. "I'm sure you deserved it." 

* * *

"You still don't have an owl? I suppose I should send Ginny a patro-" Hermione gasped as Harry snatched her wand out of her hand. "Harry James Potter!" she whisper-shouted, not wanting to wake Lizzie. 

"Trust me. I'm doing you a favor. You do _not_ want to remind Ginny you exist right now." 

Hermione bit her bottom lip. "This isn't like Ron and Lavender is it?" 

Harry shook his head. "Does the term bridezilla mean anything to you? Be very glad that you have an excuse to avoid her right now." 

She flinched. "Not existing to Ginny right now sounds like a good idea." One of the grad students at school last year had been marrying a bridezilla and despite not being anywhere near the same social circles, Hermione still heard regular horror stories. Colleen took particular delight in relaying the drama, though she treated it as a comedy. There were days when Hermione wondered why she roomed with her for all four years. 

"Word to your mother," Harry intoned solemnly. 

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Your attempts at Americanisms are almost literally physically painful… and I think potentially racist." 

"Really?" 

Hermione shrugged. "I'm not entirely clear. I didn't pay much attention to pop culture when I was in school." Adjusting to American academic culture had been hard enough after living mostly in the British magical culture. Trying to figure out the various racial subcultures in America wasn't something she had time to do on top of her studies. 

"Huh. I thought your letters said something about movie nights." 

"Movie nights with _engineers_. I absorbed trivia like why the USS Enterprise could defeat a Star Destroyer." 

"Really? Wasn't the Enterprise an exploration vessel?" 

Hermione sighed. Of course she had to bring up the one argument that Harry would be able to understand the basics of. Normally his lack of knowledge about entertainment was quite reliable and the last thing she wanted was to go over this same argument again. "To summarize, even the original Enterprise out ranges Star Destroyers." 

"That sounds like there's a story there." 

"Not really a story, just Star Trek nerds arguing with Star Wars nerds over and over again." 

"Better than listening to Ginny arguing about the exact shade of red she wants for the buntings. I didn't even know what buntings were this time last year! Don't get me started on the china patterns. Better yet, don't get her started." 

"Uh huh. Now about this business where you grabbed my wand…." 

"You could spank me," Harry said hopefully. At least it would have sounded hopeful to anyone who didn't know him as well as she did. 

Hermione fixed him with a glare. "You can't kink bluff me, Harry." Especially since she'd seen him try this on Ron before. She did have to admit that Ron's reaction had been hilarious before he figured it out. 

"Right. Apology back rub?" 

"That's a start." Hermione sighed. Not spotting a good chair to sit in for him to give her a backrub, she moved towards the dining room. Harry didn't need an explanation as he followed her. "Part of me is surprised she and Neville lasted this long. She never really seemed proud that they were together." 

Harry shrugged as he rolled up his sleeves. "Well, there was that expectation that she and I would get back together. But it could be worse. She did such a bad job leading up to it-" 

"That she made it sound like she threw you over for Malfoy. Yes, you've mentioned this a few times." 

"It's a good story." 

Hermione rolled her eyes. "The first or second time." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any references to the behavior of American engineering students are drawn from my experiences in school. Basically, Hermione is complaining about me.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a long day. Hermione hadn't interacted much with Teddy and Lizzie today, but she got tired just watching them. Teddy had been chasing Lizzie with a stuffed brontosaurus for what seemed like hours. Lizzie had the T-Rex, which she had decided, because it was yellow, was frightened of the herbivore. Lizzie was much more active with Teddy around, though Hermione wasn't sure how much of that was getting back to how she was before Katie died and how much was her dynamic with Teddy. 

Of course, if she felt tired, Harry looked like he had been run over by a lorry. He probably would have gone to sleep already if he hadn't developed a headache, which he was trying to address with some ginseng tea. Back in the muggle world she would have assumed a boy not taking pain medication was machismo, but Harry knew exactly what went into a headache potion, so it was a bit more understandable. 

"You know, I've graduated," Hermione said as she sat down on the couch across from Harry. This was just taking advantage of the opportunity of a free moment and wasn't at all about pouncing while he was weak. 

Harry groaned and let his head fall forward. "And you want me to make good on my promise to tell you why I wasn't dating." It was nice to know that he could still follow her thought processes so easily. Of course, he was probably expecting this conversation to happen a week ago, but Hermione had decided to wait for him to get enough sleep for once before she pushed it. Then she realized that that wasn't going to happen until Lizzie left for Hogwarts. 

"You did say you'd tell me when I came back for good." She didn't think much about the fact he wasn't dating while he was in Auror training. By all reports, he barely had time to eat and sleep back then. Of course, that was because he had been driven to prove that he had earned his spot, and Harry also spent a lot of time with Teddy. But a couple of years ago she had finally gotten curious about why he was still fake dating Katie. He begged off and said he was still working out why with his therapist and he'd tell her once he figured it out himself. Then once he had figured it out, he had put her off saying that if she knew, she'd probably be frustrated when she went back to school, and she trusted his judgment on that one. 

"Keep in mind it took something like three years for my therapist to drag this out of me." 

"Harry," she said in a disappointed tone that used to make him look at his feet. 

Rather than do that, he just lifted a finger. "I know, therapy works best if I cooperate, but the problem was I was lying to myself." 

"Which is why you needed therapy in the first place." 

Harry shrugged. "If you don't count being orphaned at fifteen months or how I was raised or having someone try to kill me every year I was in school or-" 

"I get the point," she said dryly. 

"Yeah, so years of therapy compressed into a single sentence: I was and still am in love with someone, so why date?" 

"It took you three years of therapy to figure this out?" 

Harry twisted his hands in a helpless gesture. "I didn't have the best upbringing. I figured out lust on my own, but love? I kind of thought they were the same thing for a while." 

The sad thing was how much sense that made. See the mess with Cho. Actually, no, everyone was better off pretending that never happened. "Well, you wouldn't have been the first teenage boy to make that mistake. Was it Ginny?" Harry definitely hadn't seemed happy that the redhead had gotten together with Neville while they were horcrux hunting, even if he could joke about it now. 

"Give me a little credit. We actually dated. I don't think it would have taken three years of therapy for me to figure out I was in love with her." 

"Maybe just one or two." 

"Oi! I'm not that bad." He hung his head slightly. "Well, maybe I am." 

"Have you told your mystery woman yet?" 

"I was going to once before, but she told me she was looking forward to a date with another guy and I…." 

"Chickened out?" 

Harry sighed. "Basically. I was going to try again but then Polperro happened." 

"Was she-?" Hermione didn't know if she couldn't compete with a dead woman. 

Harry shook his head emphatically. "No. It's just that I'm a dad now, so I have to think about what's best for Lizzie. She's had quite a few shocks to her system lately. Then there's the question about if I even have time for a relationship. I think the worst case is if things work out for a while, Lizzie gets attached and then we break up. I even did that list of pros and cons like you usually suggest and it looks about even right now." Harry threw back his head and groaned. "Why did I ever think life would get easier out of school?" 

"Because our school years were defined by a madman out for your life," Hermione said dryly. "Will you at least tell me who she is?" Hermione was fairly certain it was a she. Ginny had described him as depressingly heterosexual, though Hermione had repressed the context of that statement. 

Harry opened his mouth, then paused. "I have an idea!" he said in a bright tone that had heralded so much trouble when they were kids. She could practically see the light bulb over his head. 

Hermione groaned and tried joking. "Didn't we agree that I should do the thinking for you?" 

"Exactly! If you can guess who she is, I'll tell her. That means I don't have to decide when to tell you or not." He grinned happily to himself as if this was the cleverest thing he'd ever thought of. 

Hermione grabbed a throw pillow, but managed to resist the urge to cover her face with it. Or throw it at him. "Are you sure this isn't the headache or the sleep deprivation talking?" 

"I'm almost positive it is, which is why I'm pushing responsibility off on you." 

"Just like always," Hermione muttered. "Do I at least get a hint?" 

"She's single right now." 

"Not Ginny then." 

Harry huffed. "We already established that." 

"Cho?" 

"Dating a muggle bloke last I checked." 

"Luna?" 

Harry made a face. "Have you talked to her at all in the last year or so? Let's label her relationship status as 'it's complicated' and leave it at that." 

"I don't want to know, do I?" 

"Probably not." 

"I'm going to ask anyway." 

Harry smiled fondly. "Because you're you." 

"Not tonight, though." 

"No, it'll take a while before your curiosity overcomes your better judgment." Harry pursed his lips for a moment. "Though, to be fair, I don't think Luna thinks her relationship status is complicated." 

Hermione actually flinched at that. "That makes me picture something more complicated, not less. Any other hints?" 

"Hmmm. Well, she prefers nightgowns to pajamas." 

"Arse. How many girls do I know the sleepwear preferences of?" 

"I'm guessing Ginny, the other girls in Gryffindor our year and your roommates in university." 

"That was a rhetorical question, Harry, and I only had the one roommate." 

Harry frowned. "I thought you had multiple roommates when you were in the summer dorm." 

She shook her head. "No, those were suitemates. Summers I stayed in the graduate dorm which had private rooms, but shared bathrooms. During the spring and fall terms I was in the undergraduate dorm where I shared an actual room with Colleen." 

"Right. The asexual who liked romance movies." 

"Honestly Harry, it's no weirder than people who like watching sports but not playing them. And I'd rather put up with her movie habits than someone who brought home guys all the time." 

"Well, I'll be bringing a guy home practically every day." 

Hermione threw the pillow at Harry. "Teddy doesn't count." 

* * *

Hermione honestly wasn't sure how much sleep Lizzie got. It wasn't a lot for a human being, much less a four year old. Harry had advanced the theory that she was hoping that Katie would come back and wanted to be awake when it happened, because Lizzie used to be better about her sleep cycle. Hermione took one look at Lizzie sneaking glances at Harry napping on the ground, and came up with an alternate hypothesis: she wanted to make sure that Harry didn't disappear on her too. 

It made it hard for Hermione to hold on to her resentment of Lizzie's presence. The girl absolutely had good reason to be as clingy as she was… and had stopped Harry from confessing to his mystery girl, which was also something Hermione was grateful for. 

At the moment Lizzie was on the floor, resting against Harry's leg and sleepily stumbling through reading the beginning of "The Velveteen Rabbit" which had also been one of Hermione's favorites growing up. She was pretty sure the reading level was a bit above what an almost five year old could normally handle, but Hermione would be the last person to discourage stretching your limits in reading difficulty. 

"That's sateen, not satin," Hermione interrupted as Lizzie read out loud the description of the rabbit's construction. 

Lizzie furrowed her brow. "Are you sure? Daddy always says satin." 

Hermione squashed her knee jerk emotional reaction to curse Harry for ruining a young girl's reading skills. It's not like the magical world with its love of hand written books was particularly good about spelling. "Your daddy's a boy and probably doesn't know that sateen is a kind of cloth." 

Lizzie frowned. "Then what kind of cloth is sateen?" 

The next half hour was spent explaining the difference between satin and sateen, velvet and velveteen, how spelling drifts over time and why the construction of stuffed animals changed as technology evolved. Hermione recalled having a similar conversation with her mum when she was around Lizzie's age, except she had it easier, being able to conjure samples of the different materials. With how Lizzie soaked up knowledge, Hermione was sure that the little girl's sperm donor had been a Ravenclaw. She definitely didn't get it from either Harry or Katie. 

Hermione was in the middle of explaining suspension of disbelief as related to the use of cheaper fabrics in stuffed toys when Lizzie nodded off. She might have been offended if she didn't know about Lizzie's current bad sleeping habits. 

"Were you trying to teach my daughter to gamble?" Harry whispered. 

"Prat," she whispered back as she tried to ignore how sexy Harry's paternal instincts were and the fact that she and Lizzie had been basically lying against him for their discussion. "I was just explaining the poker chip theory of suspension of disbelief." 

"I'm not familiar with that one." 

"You know what suspension of disbelief is in general, right?" 

Harry nodded gently, though that motion was enough to get Lizzie to stir slightly. 

"The poker chip theory is that when a person starts a story, he gives the author a figurative pile of poker chips, and the reader will only keep reading as long as the author has chips in his pile. Whenever the author does something that doesn't match reality or what the reader expects, he spends chips. So in context, making the rabbit out of velvet and satin would have cost a lot more chips in the beginning than velveteen and sateen. Well, at the time the book was originally published. Now, obviously, children don't know what those materials are." She poked Harry in the leg. "Or their fathers." 

"That sounds awfully simple for a theory needing a name." She couldn't see his face with her head resting on his abdomen like this, but she could tell he was rolling his eyes. 

"That's just the basics, Harry. There's also how you can set things up to reduce chip costs, like foreshadowing a plot twist." 

"But poker chips?" 

"I won't say Americans are obsessed with money and gambling, but most of the ones I was around were." If Hermione was bluntly honest, the people here were pretty obsessed with money as well. There were probably more places to buy lottery tickets here than there were back at school, but perhaps she wasn't accounting for population density. 

"Between that and the Star Wars/Star Trek arguments, I'm getting a very funny image of the Colonies." 

"A very funny image would be about right for engineering students. Don't get me started on hairy geek guys in awful blond wigs doing Sailor Moon cosplay." 

"What's Sailor Moon cosplay?" 

Hermione paused to answer for a few moments. "Ignorance really is bliss. You have no idea how lucky you are." Though she would have to see if she could get Harry in a Sailor Moon outfit. He had the legs for it. 

* * *

Despite being medical professionals, Hermione's parents served a very unhealthy brunch. Thankfully, it was only something that happened on Sundays. On the downside, her parents were also of the opinion that being surrounded by greasy comfort foods was the perfect environment to deliver awkward news. At least they had bothered wearing robes while Hermione was visiting. This time. 

Still, despite Hermione having the association of Sunday with uncomfortable information, she wasn't sure she heard her father right. She looked at her omelet suspiciously as if it had said something and then back at her dad. "Retiring? I thought you two would keep working until you died. And then your skeletons would still try going into work." 

"Honestly, Hermione, we aren't that bad," her mother chided her as she peeled a grapefruit. 

Her dad flinched as some juice squirted in his direction. "Though for a long time we had to tell ourselves we were." 

"What do you mean, dad?" 

"It costs a lot to go to dental school, set up a new practice, put things on pause to have a child…. We didn't really have a choice about the hours we were putting in to pay off all the debt we were in when you were younger. Things went easier if we told ourselves we really loved our work." 

"But you're only in your mid fifties," Hermione protested. 

"I don't think fifty-eight counts as mid fifties anymore," her dad replied. 

"That's still a good seven years before traditional retirement age." 

"Well, if someone hadn't sent us to Australia and shown us how good taking it easy was, then maybe we would have lasted to sixty-five," her mother said pointedly. 

Hermione bit back a groan. She couldn't even say they were complaining about it. It made her feel even worse that they were continually framing it as a good thing. 

"If you're worried about our financial situation, we have some hobby income in addition to our retirement funds." 

Her mother shook her head. "I still can't believe people buy your paintings." 

"Sunflowers are a perfectly acceptable subject matter for art. They aren't as creepy as your knit bees." 

"Knit bees?" Hermione asked slowly. 

"Oh? I haven't shown you them? Let me fetch some." In her haste to get up, her mother's robe fell open. 

"Mum! Modesty!" 

"Don't be so uptight, sweetie." 

* * *

Hermione didn't expect to literally run into Lavender. Of course, she had been under the impression that Lavender was still acting like a shut in and hadn't thought to ask anyone if she was working or where she was working. Madam Malkin's shouldn't have been a surprise. 

"Oh. Hermione." 

"Uh, hello, Lavender. I'm here to pick up my robe order." 

Lavender shook her head as if clearing out cobwebs. "Right, I thought I saw that behind the counter." 

Lavender looked good. Hermione didn't think she would have noticed the scars if she didn't know they were already there. Then again, knowing Lavender, she probably thought that was still a massive problem if someone could notice them despite makeup and concealing magic. Oh, there were glamours that could conceal them completely, but they tended to have side effects like making people not notice you at all, which would be bad for someone working retail, or making your skin look fake and plastic, which is often worse than the blemishes in the first place. She wasn't familiar with the spells herself, but she remembered Lavender and Parvati talking about them back in school. 

There was an awkward silence as Lavender went behind the counter to find Hermione's order. Why didn't she ask Madam Malkin to just owl her a package? Right, because she wanted the excuse to get out of the house. She had always gotten along with Teddy and she was doing much better with Lizzie now that they were reading buddies, but it was still nice to get away every now and then. 

"That's funny. I could have sworn I just saw it," Lavender muttered. She seemed to find things about as uncomfortable as Hermione did. 

"I needed new robes for work. My job starts up next week," Hermione said more to fill the silence than any thought that Lavender might be interested. 

"Oh. That's nice," Lavender said in a tight tone of voice. Then in a lower, more frustrated tone said, "Where are they? I just saw them." 

Hermione sighed and decided to just confront the elephant in the room. "I'm not interested in Ron, Lavender." 

Her former roommate stilled, and then snorted softly. "After the way he dumped you, I don't blame you. _You're_ not the one I'm worried about." 

"Honestly, Lavender, I could see being worried about the Ron from fourth year, but he's grown up since then." Hermione paused. "A bit at least." 

Lavender giggled a bit at that, but didn't seem too reassured. "Oh! Actually, I think I saw them in the back. Just a moment." 

* * *

Harry had basically refused monetary payment for taking care of Teddy during the day, so Andi usually stopped by with dinner for everyone. (Molly's care packages were relegated to lunches.) After dinner she would, in theory, take Teddy home, but in the two weeks since that arrangement started, half the time they ended up staying over for the night, everyone being firmly of the feeling that if Teddy had fallen asleep there was no point in waking him. 

The adults had settled in the living room together. Andi and Hermione usually took that time to do some light reading, while Harry read up more on parenting and child psychology. According to Harry, half of that was because he had seen the statistics on how adults who were abused as children tended to have abusive habits, and was absolutely determined to analyze his behaviors to make sure he wasn't doing anything like that himself. The other half was because he was paranoid about his ability to help Lizzie through the process of losing her mother. 

Hermione was certain that throwing himself into raising Lizzie was Harry's way of dealing with the fact the closest thing he had to a girlfriend had died. Hermione herself felt bad that she didn't feel worse that Katie and Alicia died, but she had never been close to them. At least studying was more productive of a coping method than Harry's teenage choice: brooding. 

Tonight Harry had a parenting magazine with a cover proudly claiming in awful yellow letters that it had tricks to optimize dating success for single parents, though Hermione was sadly sure that he was more interested in the article on taming tantrums. 

Before he could get into it, Hermione asked, "You're going to Neville's tomorrow, right?" 

Harry sighed. "Yes. The joy of helping with wedding planning." 

"Would you mind taking my present along with you?" 

Harry blinked owlishly a few times. "Present?" 

"Honestly, Harry. It's his birthday. Next you'll tell me you forgot your own birthday. They happen right after each other." Hermione rubbed her temples with one hand. "You have, haven't you?" 

"Oops?" 

Andi looked up from her novel. "How? Teddy and Lizzie haven't been at all subtle in planning for your birthday." 

Harry shrugged. "It could be sleep deprivation, or it could be that I'm still not used to my birthday as something people celebrate." 

"I'm going to kill your aunt and uncle," Hermione muttered. 

He shook his head. "I'd just as soon not think about them ever again." 

Hermione huffed and picked up the photocopies for her article on shape memory polymer nanocomposites. Harry tilted his head and tried to read the title upside down, mouthing the words as if they were in a foreign language. It was light reading for her, but Harry paled and practically took cover behind his parenting magazine. 

* * *

One month on the job, Hermione could say that she had expected her research position to involve more actual research. It seemed like she spent half her time in meetings. Her boss said it was mostly to keep everyone on track and honest. Not that she expected her frankly fanatically curious coworkers to slack off, but rather if they didn't get forced to make regular updates they tended to go off on weird tangents. This included something called "the Jelly Incident" which no one would elaborate on, apparently because it might give people ideas. Another issue was getting fixated on a particular problem and not changing mental gears to get out of the rut. It was a surprisingly rational approach to managing people that she might have expected in the muggle corporate world rather than magical research. 

Also in the last couple of weeks, Harry had managed to adjust to being a stay at home dad taking care of two kids during the day and no longer looked like death warmed over. Part of that was that Andromeda no longer dropped Teddy off, she came along herself, or rather the two had effectively just moved in. It might have seemed like a step backwards for Andi, going from working alone at home to working in the house with two kids, but she was thinking long term. Two adults watching over two children was still better than her previous situation of one adult watching over one child, and much less likely to burn Harry out. Multiple children together could multiply the chaos, but it was worth it since they also kept each other entertained. 

Every day Harry prepared Hermione a lunch to take to work. He claimed that it was his way of paying her back for all the time she spent with Lizzie, since it wasn't something she signed up for when she decided to move in with him. Sometimes there was a drawing from Teddy and/or Lizzie included. For a while there were some horrible origami flowers that the kids made after Harry found a book on paper folding supposedly for ages four and up. Occasionally there was a short note from Harry. Today's note read "Hint: she enjoys watching ballet." 

Since their discussion about Harry's true love, he had given her three or four additional "hints" per week. His so-called hints were all useless to her for figuring out who this woman was. They could be so general that they could refer to anyone. For instance, lots of women liked to wear their hair up at work. The hints could also be just oddly random like the ballet hint, where she just didn't know people well enough to know if they'd even seen ballet. In fact, the only people she could think of who had seen ballet were her and her parents. 

Then there were the hints that spoke of incredible intimacy. Even if she'd known someone for years, she didn't think she'd know how many freckles they had on their shoulder or how many stuffed animals they kept in their bedroom. Maybe she could have claimed that level of intimate knowledge with Ginny after rooming together so often during the summers. Hermione might have worried about Harry stalking the poor mystery girl if she knew that he just didn't have the time. 

Still, on some level she liked this game. She had missed her best friend while she was in the Colonies, and this let them be engaged on some level even when she was at work. It also helped her come to terms with his affection for this mystery woman. She could tell by the little details he noticed that he really loved this person and it wasn't just infatuation. She was worried that he idealized the object of his affection, but he said that he'd only need to worry about it if she figured out who it was. Ultimately, she liked the intimacy of something that he shared just with her. 

Unfortunately, the lunches and the personal touches that went with them were about the extent of what was just the two of them now. When she'd get home she'd find Harry being pulled in a dozen different directions by just two kids. Or at least that's what she thought before getting home tonight. Instead she found a practically giddy Harry waiting for her at the door. "Andi has agreed to watch the kids tonight. I've got something to celebrate and I was hoping you'd do me the honor of accompanying me to dinner, Miss Granger." 

Hermione smiled. "Of course, Mr. Potter, it would be my pleasure. What are we celebrating?" 

"I'll tell you when we get to the restaurant. How does upscale French sound to you?" 

"It sounds like I need to get changed." 

"Reservations are in an hour. You've got time." 

"Barely." 

"At least you're a witch. Imagine if you didn't have magic and I sprung this on you." 

"You could have sent me a message at work," she said as she folded her arms. 

Harry cocked an eyebrow at her. "With the security in your department? Last time I sent you a message, you got it the next week." 

"You're exaggerating." Admittedly, it was only by a little. 

"I should probably throw on something a little fancier as well." 

Harry hadn't been joking about the restaurant being upscale. Le Gavroche was one of the best French restaurants in the world, including France. Hermione had no idea how Harry managed to swing a reservation on what sounded like short notice. They were usually supposed to be made three months in advance. Even Harry's status as whatever hyphenated title they were using for him now shouldn't have helped in this place. 

"So what's the occasion?" 

"It's been three days since Lizzie has asked for Katie." 

Hermione smiled. "I can see why you didn't want to celebrate with the kids." 

"I know she's going to remember soon and get depressed and guilty, but it's so good to see her moving on." Harry got a panicked look for a moment. "I mean I don't want her to forget Katie, but I like a smiling, happy Lizzie better than the version that cries all the time." 

"I know what you mean. I just think that celebrating in one of the most exclusive restaurants in England is a bit much." 

"The reservation was originally Bill and Fleur's. Gabrielle decided to run away from home and showed up on their doorstep. They asked if I knew anyone who wanted the reservation." 

"Again?" This was at least the third time Gabrielle had decided to visit her sister without warning anyone about it. There were almost certainly incidents that Hermione hadn't heard about. Calling it running away from home was a slight exaggeration as the first thing Fleur would do is tell her parents where her sister was. 

"At least school isn't in session this time." 

"Well, under the circumstances I think I can forgive the short notice." Though she did wonder why they didn't just go to dinner and leave Gabrielle in the house. Fleur's sister was old enough to not need a babysitter. 

The rest of the night they talked about food and inconsequential things. The food was definitely worth being the center of conversation. Harry had worked for the Ministry so he understood that there's a lot she couldn't talk about regarding work as well as how pointless some of the security restrictions are. Still, it was fun just being with Harry for a while. 

When they got home they found Andromeda with a glass of wine and a book in the sitting room. They didn't keep alcohol in the house, but Andi had her supply back at her own place. It was practically the only thing she still used that building for. That and storing books that haven't made their way to Grimmauld Place yet, which was a considerable quantity considering her research job. 

Harry walked Hermione back to her room and gave her a peck on the cheek before checking on the kids. Hermione's heart fluttered a little watching Harry's soft smile on seeing a sleeping Lizzie. She didn't realize she had touched her cheek as she entered her room to prepare for sleep. 

* * *

It was the weekend and Hermione had joined Harry as he took the kids out for ice cream and some time in the park. The kids in this case being Teddy, Victoire and Lizzie. Teddy and Victoire had wolfed down their ice cream and were currently on the big kid swings, trying to see who could get higher. Hermione was a bit envious of a metabolism that let them exercise without getting cramps after eating like that. In Harry's defense, he did make them rest for a bit before getting on the swings, but he only managed to get them to sit still for five minutes. He had even brought coloring books, which was probably the only reason they managed those five minutes. 

Lizzie, on the other hand, had superhuman patience for a four year old and had decided to savor her lemon ice cream. It probably helped that Hermione had charmed it to not melt, which let the girl take her time. 

The three of them sat at a park picnic table watching Teddy and Victoire, and in Hermione's case, getting exhausted simply by proxy. 

Lizzie stared at the child sized ice cream cone. "Why is everything that tastes good bad for you?" 

Hermione glanced at Harry, who seemed unable to formulate a response. "Do you really want to know or are you just complaining?" she asked. 

"I really want to know!" 

"Do you know what evolution is, Lizzie?" The girl shook her head. "Evolution is species changing to fit their environment, the place where they live." 

Lizzie shook her head and tried brushing off an insect that was flying too close to her ice cream. "I don't get it." 

Hermione took a moment to think of a non-morbid example. "Giraffes have long necks to eat off of tall trees. If they lived in a place with shorter trees, they wouldn't have long necks." 

"Ohhh." 

"Humans developed in places where food in general was hard to get, and so things like sugar and fat, which have a lot of energy for small amounts were the things they should eat first, so our bodies made us want to eat them first by making them taste good. But because they were so rare our bodies never needed to learn how to deal with too much of them." 

"But why doesn't e-fo-lu-ton fix it now?" 

"Evolution, Lizzie. And evolution takes a long time. It took six million years for giraffes to get their necks." 

Lizzie stared at Hermione wide eyed for a moment. "That is a long time." Then she frowned. "So in six million years kids could eat as much ice cream as they want?" 

"It seems likely." Hermione didn't mention that it was a possibility that humans might evolve to simply want less sugars and fats rather than processing them better. She didn't think the almost five year old would believe that it was possible to not want ice cream. Nor did she mention all the deaths from diabetes that would have to happen between then and now. Of course, with artificial insulin being available it might take longer. 

Okay, she may have put a little too much thought into the topic. She was the child of dentists, and had often contemplated what it would require for her to get more sugary treats. Being a responsible adult had simply directed those thoughts to more scientific directions. 

There was a gust of wind and Harry reached to grab one of the coloring books before it slid off the picnic table. Having kept it from blowing away, he settled back and said, "I'd say you thought about that too much, but you took a course on evolutionary biology." She felt a quiet thrill that he unknowingly echoed her thoughts from just a moment ago. It was also sweet that he thought this was a result of academic interest and not personal interest. 

"I'm surprised you remember," Hermione said as she noted that Lizzie had decided that she was more interested in finishing her ice cream than listening to the adults talking. Of course, at her age very few things trumped eating an ice cream cone. 

"For some reason, that presentation your classmate did stuck in my head. The one on the evolutionary history of cows and how you could tell how closely you should put species together on the whatchamacallit tree based on how the animal tasted." 

"Phylogenetic tree," Hermione said absently as she wondered how much of her explanation Lizzie understood or if she was just picking out the parts that interested her and ignored the rest. 

"What I don't remember is why you took the course in the first- Teddy, don't chase Victoire with that snail!" 

Hermione blinked. She swore she only took her eyes off of the playing children for half a minute and in that time they had gotten off the swings and Teddy apparently found a snail. How Harry had identified it as a snail at this distance when she knew his glasses prescription was out of date was a mystery. Both Teddy and Victoire had giggled at Harry's shout, so it seemed that Victoire didn't mind snails. Though, Hermione couldn't figure out why she ran if she didn't care about gastropods. 

Hermione shook her head and tried to get back to the conversation. "Right. I needed a biology unit and the professor was highly recommended, but she didn't have any general biology classes available that didn't conflict with other requirements I wanted to get out of the way that term." 

"This is a class?" asked Lizzie. 

Hermione made a hum of agreement. "I took it three years ago." 

"Was it fun?" 

"I thought so. The professor was very good." 

Lizzie nodded and went back to her ice cream. Hermione wondered if the lack of distaste for school would last once she started going to school herself. Still, she seemed interested in a lot more things than Teddy or Victoire, which was a good sign. 

Harry smiled ruefully. "I don't know if I'm happy or sad you weren't here for their why phases. I'm sure you would have done a better job at answering the questions, but that might have just encouraged them." 

Hermione blinked slowly a few times at that. "This isn't her why phase?" 

"Nope. This is a hundred times better." 

Hermione made a mental note to do something nice for her parents as Lizzie reached for the coloring book. Spotting the yellow sheen from the ice cream on Lizzie's hands, Hermione helped the messy haired girl with some wipes first. She was a good kid, but sometimes had trouble with her execution, just like her dad. There were days where Hermione forgot that Harry wasn't related to her biologically. 

* * *

"I can't believe you're already getting ready to turn over the practice," Hermione said as she helped her mum pack up her office. She wrinkled her nose at the scent of the cleaner her mother was using, her mother being the kind of person who cleaned before the maid service arrived. 

"It's convenient timing. Dentists graduate the same time as everyone else, so most practices turn over or get started in the summer or winter." 

Hermione thought about that. "I can see it being more common to join during those times, but surely established practitioners don't need to wait." 

"You're forgetting about how humans tend to do things on significant anniversaries, sweetie. Also with children some things are easier if done during holidays. It's not carved in stone, but it is statistically significant." 

Hermione might have continued that line of conversation if she hadn't noticed something on the wall. "Ugh. I can't believe you kept this picture in your office." Said picture was of Hermione, somewhat older than Lizzie was now and holding a book in her lap. In the picture Hermione seemed disgruntled to have her reading interrupted and was giving the camera a distinctly evil look. 

"What can I say? It's very you. And if I only took pictures of you when you were amenable to the idea I wouldn't have any pictures." 

Hermione wondered how many pictures of Katie were still around and made a note to try to track some of those down. For that matter, Teddy could use some photos of Tonks and Remus. That made her look at the other pictures on the wall. 

"I don't see any pictures of you other than your wedding photo." 

"Ha! That's because both you and your father aren't picture people. I'm the only one who thinks of taking photos." 

"Maybe we should get some family pictures done sometime." 

"Who are you and what have you done to my daughter?" 

"I'm not that bad, mother." 

"Yes, you are. You get it from your father." 

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I'm sure." 

* * *

Bill and Fleur had dropped by for tea and to deliver Molly's latest care package. It would take more than awkwardness involving Lavender and Ron for Molly to stop trying to feed Harry and Hermione. That didn't mean the awkwardness wasn't still there. 

Bill ran his hand through his hair. "Really, my family is being…." 

"A bunch of idiots," Fleur said, carefully enunciating that last word so no trace of her usual accent came through. "The only one who should be acting like this is Ronald." 

Bill tried to plaster on an innocent look, but there was definitely a smirk there. "What about Ginny?" 

The blonde sent her husband a glare that by all rights should have reduced him to nothing but a pair of smoking boots. After realizing he wouldn't obligingly turn into a pile of ash, she said "Non" in a very clipped tone. 

Harry giggled at the exchange. Hermione knew he would deny that description in favor of something like "a manly chuckle" but it was definitely a giggle. 

"So I take it Ginny has been just as bad as everyone has been saying?" 

There was a loud squeal from the next room, which caused Hermione to start, but the three actual parents in the room processed it more or less instantly and discarded it as unimportant. "Happy sound," Harry explained. 

"But not too happy," Bill added darkly. Fleur and Harry both shuddered at that and Hermione decided that she didn't want an explanation for it. Bill shook off whatever traumatic child rearing memory that had triggered and continued, "She's actually getting worse as the big day gets closer. You should have seen Ginny's tantrum when she realized that she forgot all about you." Bill's tone turned thoughtful. "I think she just wanted help with the wedding and fighting off mum." That prompted a not so delicate snort from Fleur. 

"Isn't that the job of the maid of honor?" asked Hermione. 

"Mum walks all over Hestia." 

Hermione blinked slowly. "Not Hestia Carrow, right?" 

Harry shuddered at the thought, though Bill shook his head. "Hestia Jones. I'm not sure who Hestia Carrow even is." 

"Oh, is she one of Ginny's teammates?" 

Harry nodded. "I'm surprised you recognized the name." 

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I did pay some attention when I came home from school, though I didn't think they were that close." 

Bill sighed. "Choosing the maid of honor involved fire whiskey, darts, five bars, three Nifflers and a Pygmy Puff. Hestia was the last one standing, and I'm not sure she even wanted the job." 

"Do I want to know the details?" 

Harry snorted. "Good luck. No one involved agrees on what exactly happened, but the gist is that whoever did the best on their pub crawl was going to be maid of honor…. Wait. If Ginny knows Hermione is in the country why hasn't she contacted her?" 

It was cute seeing Harry get offended on Hermione's behalf, even if it was somewhat hypocritical since Harry had been the one to stop Hermione from contacting Ginny. 

"Officially? Out of respect for Lavender's sensibilities." 

"And unofficially?" Hermione asked Bill. 

"She doesn't want you around helping with the wedding so that she doesn't have to put up with endless comparisons between you and her from Neville's Gran." 

Hermione assumed that Ginny thought that the wedding was close enough that additional help with Molly wasn't worth the comparisons. 

Harry shook his head. "They've been together longer than a third of the people in this house have been alive. You'd think Augusta would have gotten over this." 

"She thinks that I would be better for Neville? Why? It's not like we've ever had any romantic moments." 

"I do remember you aggressively getting him on the floor once," Harry said with an eyebrow waggle. 

Hermione growled. "That was with a body bind spell first year." Though if Augusta was hung up on the idea of Neville being with someone else, it would explain how Harry had gotten away with not mentioning that his best friend was in the country during the times he was helping out with wedding preparations. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Evolution conversation courtesy of my niece.


	3. Chapter 3

This was the second wedding Hermione had gone to with Harry present. Harry was actually more nervous about this one than the last one, despite there being no war going on. For some reason he found the idea of doing the best man's speech scarier than being hunted by a dark lord. Of course, this being Harry, he managed to not mention the fact that he was the best man until the rehearsal dinner. 

Harry was a stammering mess during the best man's speech. He also kept looking at the windows and exits to the hall. Knowing Harry it was half thinking about running away and half hoping that a dark lord would attack or some other life endangering event would occur that he'd feel more comfortable with. 

He also shot a lot of glares in Hermione's direction. In retrospect her pep talk didn't work as well as she hoped. Probably almost anything would have been better than what she said; the exception being the commonly cited bad idea of imagining everyone in their undergarments. Also, looks from his smoldering green eyes didn't do much to make her feel regret; she liked it when he looked at her like she was the only thing in the world. 

At least he did better than Hestia, who it seemed barely knew either Ginny or Neville. That was a distinct disadvantage of selecting your maid of honor via endurance trial. It must be some sort of masochistic sports player nonsense that let them all go through with it. 

For some reason they had the wedding party dances right after the speeches. After the rehearsal dinner, Harry claimed that it was an assassination attempt. If he didn't die from public speaking, dancing with his ex in front of everyone might do him in from the additional stress. 

Hermione did Harry a small favor and got a drink while he was dancing. That was at least one pair of eyes that wasn't watching him. 

"You should have seen Ron during the best man's speech." 

Hermione jumped a bit at Lavender's voice. She was looking less burdened than the last time she saw her. That might have been literal. The green dress she was wearing seemed much lighter than the outfit she wore at work. "Was he wincing in sympathy at Harry's attempt at public speaking?" 

"No, Ron was irritated that you and Harry still haven't gotten together despite the fact that Harry kept sending you meaningful looks while talking about true love." 

Hermione sighed. "Those were glares, not meaningful looks. I told him that he'd be fine doing his speech as long as he didn't blurt out 'I've seen the bride in her knickers.' Guess what was probably going through his head while he was talking." 

Lavender gaped at her for a moment. "You didn't." 

Hermione hung her head. "It seemed like a good idea at the time." 

Her old roommate held her stomach and laughed silently for a bit. Wiping a tear from her eye, she said, "I thought I'd apologize for being an insecure bitch. Ron isn't interested anymore and if I'd let you two see each other before now I would have seen it before." 

Hermione shrugged. "It let me avoid Ginny's wedding planning." 

"And now I don't feel guilty at all." 

"That bad? I know Harry's complained, but he's a guy after all." 

"Ugh. Neville is a saint. I would have strangled her six months ago. I almost did. The fucking doilies alone…." 

Hermione glanced back at the tables. "I don't see anything special about the doilies." 

"Exactly! Nothing that George could use to hide a prank. Ginny wanted to rely just on dire threats to keep him from ruining things, but we all know that dire threats and lack of opportunity work better together." 

Hermione gave her a dubious look. "Are you sure he wouldn't look at that as a challenge?" 

Lavender looked skyward for a moment. "Please! It's not like any of us were stupid enough to tell him that's what we were doing. We just removed temptation whenever we could." With that the song changed and Lavender glanced over to where Ron was standing. "Time to get on the dance floor with our boys." 

"Harry and I aren't like that… and he'd probably rather gnaw his leg off than dance more." 

Lavender started walking towards Ron, but said over her shoulder, "Threats and feminine wiles, Hermione." 

Okay, the thought of just threatening Harry into a relationship with her was amusing. _Go on a date with me or I'll give Lizzie a crate of energy drinks and a pallet of chocolate._ That wouldn't work because she'd have to deal with the fallout too, and Harry knew it. He'd probably panic for a few minutes before his brain kicked, though. 

Harry, however, was retreating from the dance floor, along with Ginny. Hermione got closer to hear Ginny complain, "…these shoes are even enchanted to protect against your clumsiness. Did you pack your feet with lead?" 

"Sorry, I got nervous." 

"You did better near the end, at least." 

Harry nodded. "I pretended that there were Death Eaters in the crowd and that a fight might break out at any moment." 

Hermione sighed as she got within speaking range of the two. "Of course that would make you less nervous." 

"It's your fault for giving me that advice!" 

Ginny looked between the two. "What advice?" 

"She told me that as long as I didn't say I've seen you in your knickers during the best man speech, I'd be fine." 

Ginny looked between the two again and started laughing uproariously. 

After half a minute, Hermione sighed and kissed Ginny on the cheek. "Congratulations. I'm going to go catch up with Luna." 

Both Harry and Ginny turned interesting shades of red. "Good luck, then," Harry offered. "I'll be here letting Ginny lecture me on the state of her poor feet." 

Well, that was an odd reaction. 

It wasn't a surprise that catching up with Luna ended up mostly being filled in on her dating life. Ten minutes later, Hermione looked at the blackboard Luna had conjured. "I don't know why Harry thought your relationship status was complicated." 

Luna shrugged. "I don't know either." 

Oh, it wasn't simple, but it looked more complicated than it actually was with all the boxes. Really, it boiled down to this: Luna was involved with both Rolf and Tracy and the three would have happily become a triad if it wasn't for the fact that pets that absolutely hated each other were involved. Granted, there were a lot of pets, which was the cause of most of the boxes on the blackboard, and since this was Luna she put as much emphasis on the emotional needs of the pets as she did the people. 

It also explained why Luna showed up to the wedding with a large snake as her plus one rather than a human. 

At least Hermione hoped that all the pets mentioned were animals and not humans. She supposed some of the names mentioned could have been referring to people in BDSM roles, in which case she would have to agree with Harry about it being really complicated… and maybe explain how Harry and Ginny reacted. Or why Ron backed away with a scared look when he saw who Hermione was talking to. 

Why oh why can't she listen when people say things like "you don't want to know?" 

Right. Now was time for a drink with alcohol in it. 

* * *

"Problem with your parents?" 

Hermione jumped a bit. She had gotten back home late, and hadn't been expecting Harry to still be up. Lizzie's sleep habits had settled a bit now that Teddy was staying over almost all of the time and the two had synchronized schedules. "Why do you ask?" 

"You look a bit sad." Harry moved in close enough that he would have been invading her personal space if it was anyone other than him. "No, not sad exactly. Wistful?" Then he added under his breath, "No exasperation, so at least they were covered up. This time." 

Hermione smiled slightly at Harry's ability to read her. "That sounds about right. My parents are planning their first retirement trip." 

Harry frowned. "First? Do they plan on going on a lot? They retired early. Can they afford an active retirement like that?" 

"They're planning on staying with some friends from school in Ireland for a weekend and doing some hiking. It's nothing extravagant." 

"That doesn't sound like something to be wistful about." 

"It's just that I feel very envious about their marriage." 

Harry shrugged. "I can't say I really understand. I haven't had that many examples to look at closely, really just the Weasleys and Dursleys. Nothing against the Weasleys, but I don't really want either of those marriages for myself." 

Hermione nodded. "I know what you mean. It works for them, but it wouldn't work for me." 

"Just the seven kids thing by itself." Harry shuddered. "I'd die. I'm not even sure I'm joking. Lizzie is already almost too much to handle and I didn't have to change her nappies. I did have to change Teddy's nappies, and I gave some honest consideration to getting a vasectomy at that point." 

That wasn't an uncommon reaction to children. Hermione had a classmate who had to sub for a friend at a children's theater. She reportedly asked her roommate for an emergency hysterectomy afterward. That roommate wasn't studying medicine or nursing or even biology. No, she was studying food science. 

"There's Bill and Fleur now. They've been together long enough that they can serve as an example." 

"I'll reserve judgment until I get over my instinctive terror at them trying for another baby." 

"Really, Harry? You know that you love Teddy and Lizzie to pieces." 

Harry sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "They're great. Even Victoire is nice. But they're able to think and talk and rarely have bladder accidents anymore. Babies are a different story. Maybe I'd feel different about changing Teddy's nappies if I had the whole 'held him in my arms when he was born' experience." Harry shook himself. "Tea?" Harry asked. "I just brewed up some Chamomile." 

"You made enough to share?" 

"I had a feeling you might be getting in soon." 

Yet another reason that Hermione had developed feelings for her best friend. 

They settled in for tea in the kitchen. "I know you didn't like dating muggles in school-" 

"Honestly, Harry, you make it sound like I have something against muggles. I just don't like dating someone I can't be completely open with." And it's not like she didn't try. She even had gone on the blind dates Colleen had set up right up to last winter. In retrospect, it wasn't the wisest course of action to trust the compatibility judgment of someone who liked watching romantic tragedies for the humor. 

"Uh huh." Harry shot her a look that told her that he knew that she wasn't being completely honest here. 

"And maybe the last blind date I went on was with a gay man who thought my roommate was hooking him up with a lesbian to play beard." 

Harry looked confused. "Beard?" 

"When a homosexual pretends to date someone of the opposite sex to appear heterosexual to people who might judge. How do you not know this? Wasn't that your role with Katie? I'm almost positive I've used that exact phrase with you in the past." 

Harry shrugged sheepishly. "Okay, I see how that might turn you off blind dates. But there are plenty of single straight guys around here. So why haven't you gone on any dates since you've gotten back? It's been a few months." 

"Why are you asking?" 

"Well, if you want the same kind of relationship as your parents, it seems like a relationship would be a necessary first step." 

"Well, who would I date? My coworkers are nice enough people-" 

"I can't believe you said that with a straight face." 

"Mostly nice people," she corrected herself. Of course, nice didn't preclude being completely insane. "But they have about the same level of social skills as my classmates from university. Anyone in the magical world I'd be willing to date comes in two categories: already in a committed relationship or too busy for relationships." 

"Well I understand that part," Harry muttered. "Still, you realize that you never made any commitments here that should stop you from dating. I'd hate it every moment if you did, but you shouldn't hold back because of my selfishness." 

Hermione wished that was jealousy talking and not desperation to have another pair of hands available to wrangle children. "I'll keep it in mind." 

"Seriously, your happiness is the third most important thing in the world to me." 

"Just number three?" 

"Well, Lizzie and Teddy are one and two. But you beat out Andromeda, and bad things happen if she's not happy with me." 

"Idiot," she muttered fondly. "Seriously, Harry, I'm happy. The kids are great. The food is good. No one in my department has opened a portal to a hell dimension this week." 

"Sometimes I worry that being friends with me has had negative effects on your cognitive development because you have appallingly low standards for workplace success." 

"Someone's been reading books on child psychology." She didn't want to say it was sexy, but she did like it when he showed evidence that he was improving his mind. 

Harry sighed dramatically. "It's horrible, and I can't pawn the research off on you like I did in school." 

"Idiot," she repeated. The worst part about her annoyingly platonic relationship with Harry was that it was already so close to her parents' marriage, just without the home nudism, which wasn't a part she wanted to emulate in the first place. 

* * *

"Daddy likes you more than me," Lizzie said mournfully. 

It wasn't that long ago when Lizzie had claimed the exact opposite. At this point Hermione had been around children long enough to understand that it wasn't Lizzie changing her mind at random. Instead there were a lot of thoughts going on beneath the surface making what seemed like logical connections to Lizzie and those thoughts were things that Hermione wasn't privy to, even if Lizzie believed they were obvious and shouldn't need to be said. 

Though, given that Harry had left to find more film, Hermione was pretty sure this had something to do with the fact that Hermione had decided more pictures was a good idea whereas Lizzie showed another similarity to a young Hermione in her hatred of being photographed. Teddy was actually worse and had fled, probably to hide under Andi's desk to keep from getting another picture taken. She gave it another half an hour before Andi got fed up and redeposited the young metamorphmagus here in the living room. 

"Your dad has known me for longer, but you're still his special girl who is the number one person in the world to him." And amazingly, Hermione wasn't bitter or annoyed about it anymore. Lizzie was by no means a perfect little girl, especially when Teddy or Victoire was around to get her into trouble, but part of Hermione wished she was hers. It was probably all the reading they did together. Lizzie tended to like most of the same books that Hermione did at her age, the only notable exception being "Where the Wild Things Are." 

Lizzie hummed in response to Hermione's statement and went quiet for a bit, probably having more of those thoughts beneath the surface. They were close enough now that Lizzie might tell her what she was thinking if Hermione asked, but three months of daily contact still wasn't enough for Hermione to actually understand the thought processes. Teddy was actually easier because every third thought was "How do I make this about dinosaurs?" which was better than those two weeks when he tried linking everything to evergreen trees, but he was back to dinosaurs for now. 

"Can I call you mum?" 

Dinosaurs would be so much easier to deal with, or even the trees with the needles getting _everywhere_. "You already have a mum." 

"Mummy is mummy. You can be mum." 

That wouldn't be confusing at all. "Lizzie, I can't just become your mum." 

"Why not? Daddy wasn't always daddy." 

Oh, Merlin. How was she going to explain adoption and bureaucracy? 

"Mummy said my real daddy is dead and now mummy is dead and… and…." 

Lizzie started crying and all Hermione could do was hug her and make soothing noises until she fell asleep. One small positive to Lizzie's poor sleeping habits, even improved as they were, was that when she got emotionally exhausted, sleep wasn't far away. Thankfully, she rarely remembered why she cried herself to sleep when she woke up again, and two hours later she was singing dinosaur songs with Teddy. 

Three months ago Hermione didn't even know dinosaur songs existed. 

* * *

As soon as Harry got off the phone he asked Hermione if she'd like to go to the Waterside Inn for dinner. 

Hermione gave Harry a considering look. "The Waterside Inn? Were you just trying to find something to top Le Gavroche?" 

"Fleur recommended it when I said I had wanted to try something special for my birthday." 

"Harry, that was almost two months ago… and you forgot your birthday." 

He shrugged. "Well, back before the parenting black hole I thought it might be nice to treat myself for my birthday. I mentioned this to Fleur at Ginny's wedding, and after some very sympathetic words about how parenting will do bad things to your ability to remember that you have a life outside of your kid, Fleur recommended the Waterside Inn." 

It was funny how that it was definitely Ginny's wedding and not Ginny and Neville's wedding. "Are you sure you want to take me?" 

"Well, if you won't go, I'll take Fleur and then Bill will hex me for making him look bad… and sticking him alone with Victoire with no warning." 

"So, I'd be saving your life again." 

"Probably just my ability to have children in the future." 

Hermione rolled her eyes. "At least you're giving me enough time to get ready this time." It was still, relatively speaking, last minute notice, but obviously he had just gotten his own last minute notice of an opening. Andi was amenable to watching the kids, but she still extracted some favors from Harry for leaving her alone with them with so little warning. It seemed more like Slytherin habit than any actual need to buy forgiveness as the favors weren't anything Harry wouldn't have done anyway. 

Hermione, however, wasn't quite sure she could forgive him for cleaning up so nicely. He wore a green shirt that really matched his eyes and fit well enough that she could tell that he hadn't lost any muscle since he had quit his job. She was also pretty sure that he was sharing shampoo with the kids, however, since his hair smelled like orange sherbet. This somehow made him more attractive, not less. 

They had just ordered the wine when Harry asked, "About what Lizzie said, would you like it to be true?" 

Hermione looked down. "She's a beautiful girl. I think she's already stolen my heart." 

"She'll do that to you. And you look happy and beautiful when you're with her. Even when she's putting wet icky things in your hair." 

Hermione scrunched her nose at the thought. "It would be nice if she was mine in some way. Maybe I'll kidnap her some day." 

"Last Tuesday I would have let you." 

"You're only saying that because we live in the same house." 

Harry laughed. "What I was getting at is should we encourage or discourage it when Lizzie calls you mum?" 

Hermione wrung a napkin in her hands. "I don't think it's a good idea to encourage her." 

"What would you think about making it a better idea?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Are you interested in having a boyfriend, Miss Granger? Someone who packs your lunches in the mornings and takes you out after work every now and then?" 

"Harry, just to be clear, are you asking me out?" 

"Well, seeing as we're already at dinner, no. But I was wondering if you would consider upgrading our relationship from best friends who live together to a cohabiting couple? Every time I see you I get the urge to kiss you and I don't think I'm satisfied with kisses to the cheek anymore." 

Hermione took the thought of Harry's mystery woman and ruthlessly squashed it and shoved it into a box in the back of her brain. Then set the box on fire. "What will we tell the kids?" 

"Probably nothing. I don't think our behavior is going to change that much around them. We'll have to mention something to Andi, but for the kids I think the only difference is that we don't correct them if they call you mum. Well, Teddy and Lizzie. If we let Victoire call you mum, Fleur would roast us both alive." 

"And laugh while doing it." 

The new couple didn't act much differently during dinner than they did before. They laughed and touched and shared food. The touches perhaps lingered a little longer than they did before, and Harry's eyes – Harry's bloody gorgeous eyes – held a promise she'd never seen in them before. And when they got home, instead of leaving her at the door of her room, Harry took her to his own. 

* * *

Hermione basked in the afterglow of their love making. Harry had his arms wrapped around her and pulled her close. Admittedly, she was a bit sore and there was the uncomfortable wet spot on the sheets, but she didn't want to move a centimeter yet. 

Harry gently kissed her forehead. "Here's a hint." Hermione stiffened at the mention of the other woman. "We lost our virginities together." 

Hermione took a moment to process that. Harry had been a virgin himself before tonight, so she had to be... "Me?" 

"It's always been you. I think I've loved you since we rescued Sirius at the end of third year, but I didn't realize what that feeling was until I saw you almost die in the Department of Mysteries." 

Cho was during that period, but... "What about Ginny?" 

"You seemed pretty set on Ron, so I tried to move on. It didn't work out so well." 

"Why didn't you say anything before I left for America?" 

"I- I wasn't in a good place after the war. The real reason I didn't go back to Hogwarts is because it would have interrupted my therapy routine. After you and Ron broke up and before you left, I gave some serious thoughts to telling you how I felt, but...." Harry sighed. "...if we were dating there was no way I would have been able to hide how bad things were, you just know me too well. I didn't want you to have to think 'If I break up with Harry he's going to kill himself.'" 

"Oh, Harry. I didn't know it was that bad." 

"That was the point." 

"Harry, were you- I mean, did you really think about-" 

"Hermione, I just felt done. Like I had finished everything I had been put on the planet to do. I hadn't gotten the girl, but growing up with the Dursleys taught me that I didn't actually deserve love. That cold feeling I had in my chest when I saw you with Ron, that was like the grave calling me back. And I knew that on the other side were my parents, and Sirius and Remus and Tonks and.... So one night I was downstairs, having a drink or three and I almost fired a killing curse into my head. What had stopped me was this image of you at my funeral, blaming yourself. That's when I got rid of all the alcohol in the house." 

Hermione pulled him close and buried her face into his shoulder. She knew she wasn't to blame for how he felt, but why hadn't she seen it? 

Harry made soothing sounds and stroked her hair. "I'm better now. I never would have planned on confessing months ago if I didn't think I had my head screwed on straight again. Well, mostly straight. Straight-ish." 

"I'm not worried. I wish I had seen the problem. I just wish I had been the one to help you." 

"You can help me now. You can help me in the future. Hermione, I have you in my arms now and I never want to let you go." 

"Is that a proposal, Mr. Potter?" 

"I know I don't really do normal, but that's usually lack of opportunity rather than lack of desire. I was thinking that I'd wait until we had been officially dating for at least a few months first." 

"I'll be waiting." 

Harry pulled back and tried to look her in the eye, but she kept her gaze on his chest. "Hermione?" 

"You weren't the only one who decided that they missed out on their one true love. After the battle I knew something was missing in my life. I tried doing other things like going back to my non-magical roots, then I thought it was love and romance. I dated, but I never found someone who really clicked with me. At first I thought it was because I had only dated muggles and I couldn't be open with then, but last winter I saw an article about you and Katie and I realized that it was you. I knew that I missed you, but I had buried the crush I had on you back in Hogwarts so thoroughly that I didn't realize that not being with you had created such a big hole in my heart." 

"Was this before or after you came home for the holidays." 

"Before. I didn't say anything because…. Well, I could give a lot of reasons, but the truth is I was afraid. I made my list of worst case scenarios and they didn't seem that bad. Even if you rejected me, you wouldn't be mean about it. Then I realized that the absolute worst case scenario was that you'd let me love you and then die in the line of duty. But there was no way I could ask you to quit your job just for a relationship with me. When you told me that you were going to quit for a completely different reason... well, I started to hope." She hit him. "Then you had to pull that mystery girl nonsense on me." 

"In my defense, I thought I was being really obvious that it was you, and that pretending to be oblivious was your way of letting me down easy, but you never said no, so I wasn't sure and kept it up. Then I noticed that you were actually frustrated by my last hint." 

Hermione groaned. "How many times did I think to myself that I didn't know anyone this applied to except for me? I can't believe you counted all the freckles on my shoulder." 

"Really?" 

"No, not really." 

Harry kissed the top of her head. "I love you even if you can be oblivious sometimes." 

"Or for almost three months straight," she grumbled. Then she processed what he said. "I love you, too. Though I'm not entirely sure how I ended up with a man who is so unromantic he thinks 'Pride and Prejudice' is depressing." 

Harry chuckled softly. "I found it depressing because it was your favorite romance novel and it was absolutely no help in figuring out how to woo you." 

"Hmmm. I think I can accept that reasoning." 

* * *

Andromeda had stepped just out of the room so that Harry and Hermione could have the talk with Lizzie. 

"Okay, Lizzie, we talked and if you still want, Hermione can be your mum." 

Lizzie got very wide eyed at that. She probably hadn't thought it would be this easy after all the fighting with Harry over calling him daddy. "Really?" 

Harry nodded. "Yes, really." 

"Do you think mummy would mind?" 

"I think your mummy would want whatever makes you happiest." 

Teddy popped up from behind the couch, even though Hermione would have sworn he had been upstairs. "Are you sure that Mai should be your mum?" 

"Yes!" 

"But Mai is more like the dad!" 

"What," Harry said flatly. 

Teddy waved his arms around. "Harry stays home and cooks and cleans and looks after us and Mai goes to work." 

"What," Harry repeated. 

Lizzie tilted her head to the side. "But daddy is daddy?" 

"You were going to have mummy and mum, so you can have daddy and dad!" The metamorphmagus punctuated the last two titles by pointing at Harry and Hermione respectively. 

Hermione could hear Andromeda's giggle as the damned woman walked away, leaving Harry and Hermione to explain the concept of outdated gender roles to the kids. It almost made her wish that Teddy called her a dinosaur. 

* * *

Hermione whimpered at the bright green goop in her hair. Her hair was hard enough to deal with without the potential damage from using a cleaning charm on it, and she wasn't sure what this stuff even was. None of the foods they had for the kids today was this color and shouldn't have been able to combine to form this color. It was practically iridescent. The best she could say was that it was a fitting color for Halloween. 

"Did you say something, luv?" 

"Just envying my parents again." 

"Why this time?" 

"Their daughter is grown up and can clean up after herself." She huffed and waved the offending lock of hair at Harry. "I would also like to believe I make fewer messes in the first place." 

"Just be glad that she's five now. It was worse when she was in the deliberately throwing food phase." 

"I'm fairly certain that rigging a catapult out of forks and rubber bands counts as deliberate." 

"Well, at least they were aiming for a plate," he said before whispering a spell over her hair. 

"What was that?" 

"Little trick Andi taught me when Teddy was going through his throwing food phase." 

Okay, Hermione would never look down on her parents for being muggles, but she was definitely less envious of them now. 

"In order to keep the-" 

"Yippee Ki-" There was a crash from downstairs and possibly the sound of a faint "Oops." 

Harry sighed and buried his face in her hair. "Why don't you put your costume on and I'll wrangle Lizzie and Teddy into their costumes. I'll explain later." 

Though from the sounds of it, Teddy had already gotten started on that. "Teddy's got his cowboy costume, are you sure you'll be the one doing the wrangling?" 

"Hope springs eternal." Harry straightened up and left the room, muttering "I can't leave them alone for just three minutes." 

When Hermione got back downstairs after changing, Andi was reading a book in the kitchen next to a pot of tea. The act of going down the stairs had dislodged the visor in her Sailor Mercury costume, so Hermione stopped at the hall mirror to adjust it. 

"Are you sure you don't want to come along?" Hermione asked Andi as she decided to use a spell to get the visor to fit more snugly. She was sure that Harry was going to need to call for help at any moment. Theoretically, he could have tagged in Andi, but tea time was sacred. 

Andi didn't even look up from her book. "I prefer celebrating the holiday in a more traditional manner. One that does not involve putting children in costumes that encourage running around and then feeding them large quantities of sugar." 

"When you put it like that, a costume party does sound…." 

"Frankly insane? And that's not counting what Teddy and Lizzie will get up to." 

Hermione took a moment to parse that sentence and realized that Andi had been referring to various Weasleys as children…, which was fair. "I'm sure the women will keep the boys in line." 

Andi looked up from her book and arched a brow. Hermione wasn't entirely sure if it was due to her statement or seeing the brunette in a blue wig. Frankly the wig was easier than trying to use magic to style her hair correctly. "Would you care to phrase that in the form of a wager?" 

"Not on your life." 

"Still, I suppose filling Teddy, Lizzie and Victoire with sugar and letting them loose is a surprisingly subtle revenge on the clan for snubbing you for so many months." 

"That's not the point." Hermione couldn't stop the corner of her mouth from quirking up. "Though it might be a nice side benefit." 

A few minutes later the kids ran downstairs and past her into the living room, surprising Hermione slightly because Harry hadn't ended up needing to call for help. Harry followed at a more sedate pace. 

"That's not a Sailor Moon costume," Hermione said. 

Harry pulled on one of his white gloves. "Tuxedo Mask is a character from Sailor Moon. He counts." 

Hermione thought back to their conversation where he agreed to dress in a Sailor Moon costume and recalled his strange lack of protests. In retrospect that was probably so she wouldn't clarify her meaning to the actual character Sailor Moon. Then she remembered that the Hat originally wanted him in Slytherin. "Well played, Harry. Well played." They both knew that she was smarter than him, but he could keep her on her toes. At least she didn't anticipate anyone complaining about Tuxedo Mask cheating on Sailor Moon with Sailor Mercury since she doubted that anyone else at the party would even recognize the show. 

"Besides, if Lizzie is going to be Chibiusa, I'm going to go as her dad." 

Hermione smirked. "Did Lizzie tell you why Lizzie wanted to be Chibiusa?" 

"…Why?" asked Harry warily. 

"Because Chibiusa is from the future." 

"Oookay?" 

"And in the future kids can eat as much ice cream as they want." 

Harry groaned. "I'll watch out for that." Then he muttered, "The Moon Kingdom isn't that far in the future." 

"We'll just have to get plenty of photos before she finds any ice cream and makes a mess of her costume. Especially if Teddy wants to try using his lasso to fetch any. Why _did_ you suggest a cowboy outfit for Teddy?" It was nice to have a break from dinosaurs, but cowboys seemed odd for Teddy's new fixation. 

Harry shrugged. "He seemed like the YMCA song and he already went through his law enforcement and construction worker phases, so…. Uh, what's that look for?" 

Hermione didn't know whether to laugh or whimper. "You wanted to dress up Teddy as a member of the Village People?" 

"Yes? I mean it was his choice. I just thought he might like it and he agreed." 

With that Teddy ran into the room. Harry caught him as he ran by and hoisted him up. Harry had said that he wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to carry Teddy comfortably, so he was taking every opportunity he could. "Go west!" Teddy sang as he pointed south. 

"Life is peaceful there," Harry sang in response. 

"Go west!" 

"In the open air." 

Hermione giggled. She'd send Colleen an email later saying perhaps that last blind date wasn't as bad a match as she originally thought. Of course, she would bet money that Harry had no idea that the Village People and the Pet Shop Boys were gay icons. 

Lizzie stomped in the room and put her fists on her hips. "Come _on_ , we're going to be late." 

"Coming, princess," Harry said, walking towards the little girl. As he passed by Hermione he gave her a kiss on the cheek, wobbling a bit to keep his balance with Teddy in his arms. "She gets that from you, you know." 

Hermione bumped him with her hip and the family set off to terrorize their friends. 


End file.
